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Old 03-11-2018, 10:39 PM   #24
Michael Bay Fanboi
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Seattle, Washington
Posts: 7,632
I had the misfortune to watch Annihilation this evening.

Do yourself a favor and don't make the same mistake. The whole thing is a trainwreck past the part where they enter the shimmer. They explain nothing in any satisfying way from the moment they wake up in their first campsite to the credits. Even in movies with fairly complex concepts, like say, Inception, the audience is able to follow along pretty well. Don't expect that in this film. The audience is left to make leaps of logic and connections that most will never make because they give the audience too much credit. There are plenty of viewers out there smugly saying "Oh, I GOT IT [cause I am smart and you aren't haha]" but they can go fuck themselves. The job isn't to make the rest of your audience feel dumb and this movie does that in spades even when it isn't trying. Like when it tries to explain why some plants are growing to look like human forms.

I bet most people will never understand the last two major scenes because the scenes themselves are so fucking dumb they 1) don't deserve to be understood and 2) they explanations are so out there many people will need it explained to them and a portion of those will never even bother asking, they'll just say it was a shit movie.

I understand the meta and I'm still gunna say it's a shit movie.

There are plot threads in there which wastes 5 - 10 minutes screen time for no purpose at all. For example the "Dan" subplot which for all intents and purposes does absolutely nothing in the movie that I can tell except emphasize everyone in the group is "broken" even after we've established this.

There's one scene where the person supposedly on watch at night is using a lantern. Then when something happens they complain they can't see. Of course not, you have no night vision you twit, you're using a fucking light which also helped make you a gatdamn target! And this is the least of it!

The CGI in the trailers is about as good as it gets, the rest is normal quality and pretty unremarkable all things considered. The major creatures are meh except for the "deer" they show in the trailer. The film is darkish. Not mood, just in the sense much of the film often takes place in darker settings so there isn't much detail except in a few scenes which are so bloomed and overblown with light the detail blurs there often.

I guess the book is better and maybe the movie would be better if I had read the book. I used Movie Pass to see it with my brother and I still feel ripped off.

The only time I could recommend watching this movie is if you are laid up in a hospital somewhere in a full body cast after an accident where your eyelids were tragically removed. Your head is totally fixed in a position toward the TV and you can't switch channels, the nurses are all on the coffee break, the morphine can't put you back to sleep, and you have no way to reposition yourself to avoid the travisty.

Even then I would scream for help until I lost my voice for someone to at least turn the channel to something else.

How many negative evil avatar stars am I allowed to give something? This movie deserves all of them.

Last edited by vallor; 03-11-2018 at 10:50 PM..
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